Tuesday, November 4, 2014

These Beautiful, Holy, Crazy Days...Hold Onto Them

Mamas, let's step back from this blissful, crazy life for a minute and just take it all in. I need to take it all in ya'all. To remember what it's really about. Lately I have been finding myself getting swept up in my own self and missing the moments that I so desperately want to soak in!

I have to tell you this has been a difficult mothering season for me. Honestly, some days I have been wishing it away and missing the beauty that God has put right in front of me. And isn't it true that once we're in the muck of frustration and overtiredness and "if onlys" it is dang hard to pull ourselves out. I am sure I'm not the only mama who can throw a rager of a pity party. I might think I'm going to keep the party small but it is inevitably interrupted by party-crashers Anger, Selfishness, Ego-centrism, Jealousy, Self-Righteousness...the list could go on. By the end of the thing my heart is trashed and I am not exactly sure what happened! But one thing I do know? I don't feel better.

So what if we step back from the self-pity, step back from the busyness, step back from the overtired, worn-out, if-I've-said-it-once-I've-said-it-a-thousand-times diatribe we sometimes get stuck on. What if we take a big step back and see The Big Picture. The picture that those crazy puzzle pieces are forming...of beautiful, holy, curious, joy-filled little ones learning how to grow in the safety of our love.

The things I miss when I am focused on me are too many to count. The joyful lighting up of those precious faces when they delight in something (even if that something is running away from me, bare-bummed, as they attempt to avoid a diaper change). The smiles and giggles (especially those mischievous ones...where I know there must be a hot mess somewhere in the house because that face tells me so). The fresh baby-hair smell that I could breathe in all day long. The sweet sounds of my toddler chattering away about all she is seeing and experiencing (again and again and...wait for it...again). The baby toes. Ohh those baby toes...I can't even get enough! The messy kitchen table that shows I am making memories with my precious ones even if it means that my just-swept floor looks like it hasn't been touched in weeks...and is covered in sparkles that I know I will be finding for like the next five years. The heart-melting snuggles as I comfort my babies over some newly acquired bump or bruise or hurt feeling. The middle-of-the-night stroking of soft hair as I help my loveys back to sleep after a bad dream. The face my babe makes when he tastes a new food and tries to decide how he feels about it. The ridiculous way neither of my kiddos can end a meal without food from the top of their head to the bottom of their feet. The hilarious way my girl looks at you when you tell her no and she can not believe you would deign to say such a thing to her. The way my sweet boy scrunches up his face in agony when he sees me walk by and not pick him up...the nerve! These are the moments my friends. The moments. The ones that make that big picture I want hanging above my mantle when I am old and grey. And I don't want to miss them.

So enough with the annoyance at what is not. Let's focus on what is. Let's have thankful, attuned hearts that delight in this crazy mess of life. It will not last long. Whatever season you are in...whether you are in a season of littles or one where your babes have grown great big beautiful wings and taken to the skies...don't miss it. Step back. What do you see? What is beautiful and holy and good and right? What is fun and silly and crazy? What are the keepsake moments from this season that you see? Grab them tight and place them in your heart...let them stoke a fire and be reinvigorated to delight in these moments.

1 comment:

  1. Beautifully expressed! Thank you for sharing your heart with us at Coffee and Conversation.


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